Well, in August of 2008, I became a first time mom to an incredible little girl named Lira. As of now, she is physically just over two years old, but I swear that inside, she is ancient. These first two years of her life have been incredibly challenging for me, not because of anything tragic or unusual but because of the way that being a mother has changed my life so utterly and completely.
In many instances, I've found myself struggling against the idea of being a stay at home mom as though it were my one and only identity. I'm just now beginning to embrace this role as I'm truly realizing just how temporary the specifics of it are. Yes, I'll always be a mother, but not to a two year old. Or a three year old, or a teenager or a whatever... Lira will never be this Lira again - she will grow and change as we all do, as I will too.
And in the midst of all this struggle, I've also found that mothering comes incredibly naturally to me, in a way that is almost beyond me. It can be very subtle, but I find myself knowing exactly how to inspire, encourage and teach her in a way that is very empowering to her and amazingly insightful to me.
As much as I feel as though I am contributing hugely to the growth of this little person, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, she is contributing in all these ways to the growth of me. It's a beautiful dance of giving and receiving and she is not only the best teacher and example of the kind of person she wants to be, but who I want to become myself.
I am slowly but surely realizing just how much I absolutely love tending to this child, helping her grow like a beautiful plant in my garden, and just how much she gives me in return. My relationship with this child is teaching me that I can only keep what I give away. When I give love, patience, kindness and life I become love, patience, kindness and life. And that, to me, is a pretty amazing insight when I truly understand it in my heart.
So stay tuned as I continue to share and explore all that it is to Grow Lira Jane!
